I made a mistake today. I attempted to deal with Corporate America today without taking my daily dose of Fukitol (tm), Here is the result...

Dear Chase.com Customer Service:

In attempting to see what sort of home loan I could qualify for, I encountered a problem that could frustrate, infuriate, cause current account holders to fall into seething, frothing fits of rage. The first couple of steps are easy and trouble-free. Then comes the question "Are you a current account holder?" and "Do you have a User ID?" I said yes to both, because I am and I do. I entered them both and my password when asked, and I was redirected to a log in page. I logged in.

 Again.

Then I was taken to my main accounts page. No prompt to continue the pre-qualification process, just

 "Here's your accounts,Yo!"

I figured I screwed up somewhere. so I tried again, reading all instructions with great care. I followed the steps. "Your accounts, Good Sir!" Said your responsive and efficient database.

Again, I assumed the problem was on my end. I read carefully, followed directions and once again. "Yeah...your accounts. Why do you keep logging in?"

Okay, I made that last bit up, nor do I believe your servers talk to me, but if prequalifying is this frustrating, I'd rather find a large rock and pound my head against it until I've hollowed out a domicile from it, or more likely, rent forever, than pursue a Home Loan.

Please, tell me all home lenders aren't like this? Or is it like admittance to a Buddhist Monastic Order? Do I need to log in for 3 days and night before I'm allowed to see if I prequalify? This is my first time buying a home and the whole process is foreign to me.

Help me, JPMorganChase, you're my only hope. (Well, not really, but as banks go you seem less evil than most)

Sincerely,
--Mike Jordan

Yes, this is a nearly exact copy of the email I sent to chase.com's customer service team, I made a few formatting changes, and added the pictures, because, well, refer to the frog. The automated system promised a reply in two business days. We'll see. Or Must I really repeatedly log-in for three days and nights?